Friday, January 30, 2009

Cold is a Relative Thing

This came in an email from school today. Thought that it fit
65 above zero:
Floridians turn on the heat.
People in Iowa plant gardens.

60 above zero:
Californians shiver uncontrollably.
People in Iowa sunbathe.

50 above zero:
Italian & English cars won't start.
People in Iowa drive with the windows

40 above zero:
Georgians don coats, thermal underwear, gloves, wool hats.
People in Iowa throw on a flannel shirt.

35 above zero:
New York landlords finally turn up the heat.
People in Iowa have the last cookout
before it gets cold.

20 above Zero:
People in Miami all die.
Iowans close the windows.

Californians fly away to Mexico .
People in Iowa get out their winter coats.

10 below zero:
Hollywood disintegrates.
The Girl Scouts in Iowa are selling
cookies door to door.

20 below zero:
Washington DC runs out of hot air.
People in Iowa let the dogs sleep indoors.

30 below zero:
Santa Claus abandons the North Pole.
Iowans get upset because they can't start the Snow-mobile.

40 below zero:
ALL atomic motion stops.
People in Iowa start saying...'Cold enough fer ya?'

> 50 below zero:
> Hell freezes over.
> Iowa public schools will open 2 hours late


Penny Smith said...

OK, they CANCELED school WAY before 50 below!! THAT is the only stretch! LOL!

Jessica said...

LOL I lived in Northern NH for about 10 years and all that you said about Iowan's is true of New Englanders. (At least the ones that far north!) I smoked then, and I remember going outside for a cigarette at 35 below zero, with my jacket unzipped! Now I live in SC and when it gets down to 35 above...we all whine! lol Thanks for the chuckle

mamatwoboys said...

Laughed out Loud!It's a whole new world of relativity here in Texas.